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Written by Ben
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Wednesday, 04 October 2006 |
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Is it just boomerangs or do bananas also come back when you throw them? The prime minister of the Irish republic takes around £8,000 in cash from a group of businessmen in Manchester, brings it home on the plane with him, and keeps it under his mattress until he can get his finances in order – all this while serving as our Minister for Finance. Previously he had received around £60,000 to help him get through his marital break-up. I always knew it was tough, but never knew you could get paid for it. When asked whether he had done any favours for the businessmen who had sorted him out, our prime minister replies ‘certainly not! I gave them jobs because they were MY FRIENDS, not because of THE MONEY!’ His cabinet – our government – nod their head and go ‘what’s the problem?’ The fact that our prime minister’s benefactors included property speculators is also seen as acceptable. No problem, then, with government policy which has seen the issue of housing dictated by speculators who have made billions in the past ten years from unsustainable pyramid prices. The Irish private residence property market is currently valued at half a trillion euros. Do you think it’s worth half a trillion? All those Lego estates? I hope the thought of our prime minister’s marital problems keeps us warm when negative equity trundles down our housing estates like a deranged SUV on a schoolrun. It certainly seems to be the hope of our government. And our prime minister. Bertie. The People’s Pint-Sized Politician. Still got the anorak. Still got the snug in Fagan’s. Still got the banana republic mentality.
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Last Updated ( Wednesday, 04 October 2006 )
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