Dublin Opinion

[ Photo / Text extract from ‘Marianne’ magazine ]

Dublin Opinion appears to be passing through a negative motivation system at present *. We’re all too devastated at the performance of our shares portfolios, I suspect. I have myself managed to just pull my head out of the mental sludge thanks to two factors. First off, I’ve done in my back and the usual concoction of drugs prescribed by the French doctor has me feeling a bit queasy yet strangely drawn towards posting nonsense to a blog. Secondo, France appears to be awash with GUBU-like stories at present giving me ample inspiration (just wait until I get around to the sock-based electoral scam…)

Number one on the GUBU list is the threat of two separate legal actions against a French publisher that has had some satirical ‘Voodoo Doll’ packs in circulation since early October. These dolls represent the victor and vanquished from last year’s presidential election - Sarkozy (20,000 copies in circulation) and Segolène Royale (12,000 copies in circulation). An idea of the Sarkozy doll can be gotten from the above screencap - it is sold with a thin satirical pamphlet and a set of pins. At strategic points around the body, the publishers have inscribed phrases associated with our beloved president - the ‘Work more to earn more’ slogan he foisted upon us last year (sounding more and more hollow as the weeks go by), ‘talonettes’ (Cuban heels’) and his diplomatic ‘Casse-toi, pauvre con’ spat out at a member of Joe Public at the ‘Salon de l’agriculture’ that refused to shake hands with him (famously captured by a nearby TV crew).

The Segolène doll comes in a fetching red and contains a selection of her own catchphrases - the only one I can remember being ‘Vive le Quebec libre’ from when she had delusions she was De Gaulle. Given the current astonishingly effective performance of the leading lights of the French socialist party, I assume the doll’s head can be inserted into its own anus - but I don’t have third party confirmation.

In any case, Sarkozy has decided to multiply by a factor of a hundred the publicity being garnered by this mildly amusing joke by setting in motion a legal action accusing the publishers of violating his image rights. He has already won a similar action against our old friends Ryanair, who used an image of himself and the Empress Carla in an ad campaign just after his election. Once again, he betrays a certain over-sensitivity (not to mention humourlessness) - apparently no other French president has been involved in as many courtcases in all their terms as he has in just 18 months. Segolène appears to be waiting to see the outcome of his own case before deciding on action - but the initial reaction from her camp seems as bereft of humour as that of Naboleon himself (unsurprisingly).

Looking down DO’s posts, I suspect a similar initiative for the 3 stooges pictured below might be a goer - although the excess material needed for 2 out of 3 of them might push up the RRP somewhat from the 13 EUROS asked for for Sarko and Sego. Do any of our 3 stooges even have such a thing as ‘catchphrases’ ??

Breaking News The court has decided (yesterday, I think) that Sarko doesn’t have a leg to stand on (even in his Cuban heels) and have thrown out the case. Ryanair might learn that they need to be pretend to be satirists the next time out…
Sarko is set to appeal the decision.
Segolène has changed tack and was to be heard sniffing at the President wasting time on such trifles when the world was falling apart all around. Perhaps the head-anus feature is not included on her doll…

* Post started before a flurry of activity from Conor, Donagh and Donal

** ‘NABOLEON’ stems from a contraction of the French ‘Nabot’ (midget) and a famous megalomaniac from Corsica. Those offended by lack of political correctness, please address yourselves to my ‘Near-spherical Interleg appendages’