Dublin Opinion

[PPDA - As ‘Guignols de l’info’ Presenter via infos-du-net.com ]

As I wait for my copy of this week’s ‘Charlie Hebdo’ to arrive (containing, no doubt some wry and raw observations on our recent No vote) I am reminded of a news story that held the French media’s attention for a couple of days just before they noticed Ireland again, probably for the first time since the Troubles. The story reveals a lot about how Sarkozy ticks - so it may be useful to wee Brian before he agrees to enter a room alone with him in the coming weeks - ostensibly to discuss the joys of jogging or the fight to protect voter’s ‘buying power’ or the ‘No’ word.

Shortly after Sarkozy’s election last year, a first interview was granted to the assembled main anchors of French TV news - as is customary for newly elected French presidents. Among the anchors was TF1’s suave, novel-writing, heartthrob for women of a certain age - Patrick Poivre d’Arvor. From the point of view of ladies of a certain age, I’m told, the longer a chap’s name.. In any case, during the interview, PPDA (as he’s known in abbreviation) had the indelicacy to mention that Sarkozy had appeared to him, at his first EU summit, to be as ‘excited as a little boy’.

PPDA, it should be noted, is a six footer (or more - almost as long as his name, shall we say) and Sarkozy is so comfortable with his size that he wears booster heels, allegedly. Last week, it was announced that PPDA was to be given the boot as anchor of the most watched French 8 O’Clock news, on the privately-owned TF1 to be replaced by the decidedly blonde Laurence Ferrari.

[ The new, blonder, TF1 news Anchor - Laurence Ferrari - from The La Provence site ]

Sarkozy has managed to brood on a throwaway comment for over a year and use his considerable credit with TF1’s owners, the Bouygues group, to have PPDA fired. Funnily enough, by way of co-incidence, - rumours had him linked with Ferrari before the arrival of Carlita - I believe the journalist won a ‘diffamation’ courtcase just before the election. There seems to be no limit to the places an up and coming political tyro can get to, with the help of a sturdy stepladder, again allegedly.

PPDA is nonetheless, to be maintained as the anchorman of Canal Plus’s ‘Guignols de l’Info’ - the French Spitting Image from which the above photo is taken. I haven’t seen it over the past week, but I’m certain the Sarko puppet has been doing overtime. On a completely pointless and unrelated digression, I’ll mention here that the unlikely presenter of the Spanish version of the Guignols is Leicester-born Michael Robinson capped 24 times by the Republic. PPDA was approached by the FAI himself but his grandmother turned out to be merely Breton.

Conclusions to be drawn ? 1/ Be thankful I live in a country where the guy with the nuclear suitcase appears to possess all the maturity of a fourteen year old. 2/ Advise Brian Cowen to avoid any references to the ‘Little People’ when next in Mr. Sarkozy’s presence - try instead, say, reference to the ‘Good people from the fairy mound’ having swayed the vote. 3/ Wish Alan Partridge could get an exclusive interview with Sarko :